Podcast

In this episode, I welcome back a special guest, Mary Ellen to discuss our perspective grief journeys and to provide for our listener's guideposts to help anyone on their own path of grief. We touch upon how we have approached a more healthy path of grief, accepting grief bombs as they come, holding tight to memories that have helped to shape our lives and to make room for taking care of ourselves in our new life going and growing forward. Do you know of someone who has recently lost a loved one… share with this podcast and our contributor stories at JourneyToGrateful.com

With nearly a year since the loss of my wife, I've had my fair share of milestones to push through and I've found only one way to deal with them. Head on. Pushing them down or away will not allow you to prepare for them in a manner that is healthy. However, there is one thing about milestones you must prepare yourself for… and that is the unexpected. No matter how well you think you've prepped for that upcoming milestone, something may surprise you that you hadn't considered. But then again, with my life full of unexpected grief bombs these past 11 months, I'm getting pretty used to the unexpected. Dig deep, hang on, and move forward with purpose. You've got this. 

Join me as I and my guest, Mary Ellen, experience our first grief conversation. Our focus begins with early grief and the many ways we have personally navigated those first days and weeks of our grief. We explore the idea of the individuality of grief and how to best embrace the journey and the process. We offer suggestions of coping, as we have experienced it, and share our personal expressions of support which have meant the most to us while on our specific paths of loss. Lastly, we offer insights into what works best for us when receiving support and simple, inspiring reminders of how to take care of you.

In this episode, you will join me on a walk and discuss with you What Grief Looks Like. This new format came about through a challenge from a fellow podcaster. I tend to walk to clear my head, so this friend suggested I walk away from my computer & notes, instead take you on a walk with me as I freely discuss the misconceptions of what typical grief looks like. I will share with you my experiences as well as other's who have shared similar encounters with well-meaning friends. Together, we will clear up a few inaccurate interpretations as to how grief is supposed to appear on the outside.

When it comes to support, we, as a family, have been very blessed. In numbers as well as types of support, our family and friends have truly been there for us through the illness and loss of my wife, Colleen to cancer. There is a group, however, that I feel the need to highlight as their constant support and heartfelt, thoughtfulness has simply been wonderful. It's not the usual adult friends, neighbors, or extended family, but rather, a younger group of which being a strong, consistent source of support and personal comfort is just not typically present.

It truly shouldn't matter if you are 6 days or 6 months past the loss of someone special, your ability to reach out to your support system and ask for help does not have an expiration date. You may feel it's been too long to ask for help, but your friends and family feel differently. In fact, many are themselves, wondering how to reach out to you, how they can offer to help. I'm sure of it because I've heard it from my friends. This podcast explores my experience with asking for help and my personal thoughts on how you can still ask for help even months after your loss. 

The first days after a loss are never easy. There's no arguing that point. However, there can be moments of comfort seeded in the memories uncovered. Throughout the planning that will encompass much of the first week, I was able to find bright rays of sunshine in what I knew was my darkest days. Based on memories and stories shared by family and friends, this became the catalyst of how I pushed through those first days. I discovered many grateful moments while people gathered and shared story after story, lifting me up and displaying our love for everyone to experience. These are the gems of life that, if given the chance, can brighten those dark moments and provide for you a perspective of gratefulness to help you through. 

Through the loss of my wife to cancer, I've come to understand the most valuable asset my family and friends possess is the ability to lift me up when I've needed it most with the simplest of gestures. There is no perfect formula to help someone grieve, the being there, listening, and providing a slice of normal is often exactly what is needed. However, it's hard for some people to know and understand what their grieving friend is experiencing every day. The most difficult task for those on the outside is understanding the many facets of loss are indeed present most every single day. This podcast and blog exist to help us understand the process of loss with the help of those who are living it. In this episode, I introduce you to my story, my family's story. Come with me as I discuss what has inspired me to create this podcast, Journey to Grateful, and the hopes I have of building a community of support and resource for others who are navigating through their own loss. Understand the "why" of my journey and the plans for this growing community and my many contributors. Learn how you, too can become a voice in this community by sharing your story to help others. Invite friends and family who have experienced loss or know someone who has, and help them help others through this podcast and our stories on the website. Finally, help us to shape this podcast with your suggestions and build this community to become your community.